Jolene
by FanFicy456
Summary: 'Named after the song, I was always told my mama still had something sore to the woman who 'stole' my daddy away.' (Eventual TWD Character X OC .. Who it is? Might be my darling Rick, might Mr Daryl Dixion :O) READ AWAY FAITHFULS!
1. Chapter 1

_'And jus' where do ya think yer gon'?'_

_Beer strong on his breath; a gag suppressed in my throat._

_'I got other customers, darlin'. Ain't no harm.'_

_He laughed deep and proceeded to slap my bottom, hard and loud, yet no one in the dingy, dim lit bar seemed to notice. _

_'S'nough, brother.'_

_Well, except for one guy._

_'Back off, Darylina. This here's my girl.'_

_'No, she ain't. She's a waitress. Ya know that.'_

_The Dixon brothers. It was the same every time Merle wasn't in hiding. Or wasn't in jail, for that matter. He'd come here, get drunk, and tell me how I was his 'girl'; how 'we was gon get married', or on some nights, how we were going to go for a 'lil drive in that there truck' he 'borrowed'. Then Daryl would butt in, get him to leave me be after a fuss, sometimes even a fight, and I wouldn't hear from either of them 'til the next time one them wanted a drink._

_Daryl tried to pull Merle up, and Merle pushed him off. 'C'mon now, little brother, let's see whatcha got!'_

_'Get your damn ass outside, ya idiot!'_

_Daryl grabbed Merle and shoved him toward the exit. _

_He nodded his usual shy, silent apology, and muttered my name. 'Jolene.' Pushing a howling Merle to the door, I waved and headed back behind the counter. _


	2. Chapter 2

_A few nights later, I stood dragging the broom across the scuffed up floor. The checked tiles had long lost their shine, and the lights barely reflected on the surface. What was I doing in a place like this? I was smart, that much I knew. I had big dreams of becoming a writer. Why I never followed them past college, I couldn't fathom. Why I had chose to stay in the hell hole I grew up in ... _

_'Hey!'_

_I knew she was calling, and so I chose to ignore her. The only time she ever came down from the upstairs was when she needed a drink._

_'JOLENE.'_

_'Yes, mama?'_

_My mother. I knew she was the reason I had stayed. After my daddy left; after he found someone else, he left her the bar. The Ol' Boot. They named it accordingly; apparently the bar was your friend, wasn't going to judge you. Just like an old pair of cowboy boots. I always hated the name._

_I wasn't bitter towards the old man; I hardly knew him. I wasn't born when he left, and, I mean, sure he cheated. But I'd known my mom running around with the Johnson twins next door; sleeping with them - he'd had obvious grounds for finding someone else. He tried coming around a few times over, but my ma would always chase him away with a new string of insults. Hell, the only reason I knew he was my daddy was that the resemblance was always there, first in pictures, than in person the few times I did see him. _

_I know I shouldn't have felt so obliged to take care of her, but I was all she had. And, after all, she was my mother. When she wasn't drinking, she was kind. That's the side I chose to stick around to see. _

_'You needa clean yer ears, girl?' She slurred. _

_'No, mama.'_

_'Well, I reckon ya do, 'cause I jus' told ya somethin'.'_

_No, I didn't really have too deep of the southern slur. It rang on words heavy, but I didn't turn every word I spoke into a jerking sound. I pronounced things - I probably was one of the few in our small town who could. _

_'What's that, mama?'_

_'I said, why don't ya get on up that stage and sing yer pretty little heart out.'_

_The only compliment I ever received when mama was drinking, was that on my singing voice. She always wanted me to sing. _

_I propped the broom against the wall, and walked up on the stage, grabbing the stray, scratched up, faded guitar. It was in tune, and I began to strum her favorite - my namesake. _

_'Jolene, _

_Jolene, _

_Jolene, _

_Jolene; _

_I'm begging of ya please don't take my man...'_

_I played the song several times, until she finally tired of it, and I helped her up to bed. _

_'You know why that one's my fav'rit?'_

_I always said 'no', even though I knew this story. _

_'It always was. Then, when yer daddy left - was all I could think o'. The day you was born, it was playing on the radio on the way to the hospital. I knew right then and there, that was gon' be my baby girl's name.'_

_I waited for the speech that followed, and the usual push away from her. She was quiet for longer than usual. She finally pulled away and pointed her finger at me. _

_'That damn whore, only thing on my mind on the day my daughter's born. Ha! When I saw ya, it only proved I oughta name you after that damn woman. You looked only like yer daddy, and where I was reminded o' him, I was reminded o' her - an' there you was.'_

_She spit heavy on the floor, and flopped down on her bed. My mother wasn't big, she was the complete opposite, and the bed hardly cried out in protest. _

_She was petite, but years of heavy drinking on and off; the stress of owning The Ol' Boot - she had grown to look older than what she was. She had once been beautiful, and still could be, had she not reeked so strong of hard liquor and cigarettes, or wore so much makeup. _

_I listened to her snore, then walked out, shutting the door softly._

_I looked at her picture on my way down the stairs, the same way I always did. She was about my age, maybe a few years older. Her bright blonde hair fell in voluminous ringlets down her shoulders. She didn't smile wide, but I could see the smile in her eyes especially; it was one of the last pictures my father took of her, before she had became pregnant with me, and before he had found out she had cheated. Her blue eyes shined, and her cheeks glowed bright pink. She was beautiful, and even more so when she was in love, that much was certain. _

_Upon reaching downstairs, I began to sweep again, when I heard someone bang on the window of the door. We were closed, and everyone in town knew it. We didn't get drunks coming and banging on the doors either, so I couldn't understand who it could have been. _

_I kept a pocket knife in the pocket of my apron, just in case. It was a trick my mama had come up with, and she had me doing it at all times. Of course, I had never used it on anyone, and I don't think I could unless I really had to, but it was there more as a threatening measure. _

_I was hoping I wouldn't have to use it for the first time tonight. _

_I opened the small window's curtain, to see a familiar face._

_I rolled my eyes and unbolted the door; stepped back to let him in._

_'Daryl? What are you doing here?'_

_'I came to apologize.'_

_'For?'_

_'Fer that dumbass brother o' mine. He's older, and here I am, his babysitter.'_

_'Why babysit him then?'_

_'Don't need him hurtin' more people than he already has, Jolene. He don't need to be gettin' hauled off again anytime soon.'_

_I knew Daryl loved Merle, but he was too much of a tough guy to say it. _

_'Well, apology accepted, Daryl. I appreciate it.'_

_Although Merle hitting on me was something I'd grown accustomed to, Daryl coming to apologize was not. _

_I reached out to shake his hand, but he just looked at me. _

_I had known him since we were kids. I was ten years younger than him, but talk got around in a small town; I wasn't the only one who had a rough childhood, and if anything, Daryl and Merle - especially Daryl - had it ten times worse. It had made him hard, and caused him to shut himself out to everyone. We spoke, and we got along well whenever we saw one another in town, or whenever he came to The Ol' Boot. _

_He stood up, and began to walk out. On his walk past me, his shoulder hit mine awkwardly, and caused me to stumble forward. He caught me by my arm, and helped me up. _

_'Sorry.' He muttered._

_'It's alright. Thanks.'_

_We stood in an awkward silence for a few minutes, and needless to say I was surprised by what had followed. _

_Daryl leaned forward and pushed his lips to my cheek. Rough and quick, but I could feel there was some sort of emotion behind them. _

_I wasn't sure how I felt about him, I knew him, but not as well as I could have. _

_I guess tortured souls find each other, because, there was no other reason for me kissing Daryl Dixon on the lips._

_'What're ya doin'?' He pulled back confused. _

_'Hey, you kissed me first!'_

_'On the cheek! Ya ever hear of an apology, Jolene?' _

_'Sure, but I ain't never heard of it being a kiss.'_

_'On the cheek.' He added. _

_I rolled my eyes. _

_'What? Did ya think you were gon' kiss me, and we'd ride of into the bedroom together? Hell, yer hot, but I didn't come here for that.'_

_What did I think would happen anyway? And sure, Daryl was good looking, but was he really my type? Bad, country boy, driving around on a motorcycle in a leather jacket? _

_'I don't know. My turn to owe you an apology, Daryl.'_

_He shrugged and scoffed. 'It's alright, Jolene. Don't think anythin' about it.'_

_'Alright.'_

_He nodded and walked out, and I locked the door behind him. _

_I guess I must have been feeling sorry for myself, because I don't think I ever would have kissed Daryl Dixon otherwise. _

_Tortured souls. _


	3. Chapter 3

_There was a local band playing, and The Ol' Boot was busier than ever. It was loud, and there were people everywhere. All the broken dreams, young and old had come out to support the guys playing, and hell, even I had to admit, they were sounding real good. Being good friends with the lead singer, Trent, I would climb up on stage in between serving customers and duet with him. _

_We were collaborating on the Randy Travis classic, 'I Told You So', and all the couples in the bar swayed back and forth to our harmony. Even those who weren't with someone stomped their feet and cheered. Even that of Daryl who sat in the back nodded his head and smiled at me. _

_Nice to know there was no hard feelings between us from that weird night. I guess we were both awkward in our own ways, and that night we proved it. Whatever happened was water under the bridge. _

_'I told you so, _

_But you had to go, _

_Now I've found somebody new and you can never break my heart in two, _

_Again..'_

_We finished softly, but big enough that everyone is the bar clapped. _

_'Ladies and gents, she is wonderful and beautiful; let's not forget talented - let's hear it for Jolene!'_

_I laughed at slapped at his shoulder. Trent could be such a sweetheart. He had taken a shot at me in high school, and we'd never worked out. He was a good guy, we were just incompatible. Sometimes I wondered if he still had feelings for me. Of course they wouldn't have been mutual, but a girl had to wonder. _

_I looked over to Daryl playing with his hunting knife, twirling it between his fingers, resting with his boots on the table, bottle of beer beside him empty. He knew he wasn't supposed to have the knife, at least not out anyway. _

_'Daryl Dixon, how many time to I have to tell you - no knives at the kitchen table?' I teased as I grabbed his empty bottle. _

_He looked up and smirked, sheathing the weapon. 'Sorry, ma.'_

_I rolled my eyes. 'You want another?'_

_'Nah, I'm outta here.' He placed a twenty on the table and stood up. _

_'Wait two minutes, I'll get you some change.'_

_'Keep it.'_

_'What? That's over a ten dollar tip, Daryl.'_

_'For yer pretty singin', Jo.' He smiled, and I back as he turned and walked away. _

_He really was a softy on the inside, but that would be a secret of his I'd never tell._

_I walked over to the counter, placed down the empty bottle for the barkeep, Gerry, and handed him the bill._

_When he gave me the change, I slipped it into the pocket of my denim skirt. Ain't no harm, he did tell **me** to keep it. _

_Deciding it was time for a makeup check, I weaved in between our happy, drunk patrons and into the small bathroom. _

_It was just a room with a toilet, sink, and mirror, so you had to lock the door once you were in. _

_I fluffed up my long red-brown hair a little bit. It fell in loose waves over my shoulders and down my back. I took off my apron, and made sure I still looked decent under it. My red t-shirt clung to my hips and lean frame; tucked into my high waist-ed denim mini. I checked my makeup; light brown eyeliner and shadow made my hazel eyes shine bright and i touched up my red lipstick. _

_It was days like this I reminded myself of my mother; of who she used to be. Although I looked mostly like my father, the dark eyes and hair, I had her shape of face, body and features. Wide eyes and long eyelashes, high cheekbones and full lips - I knew I was attractive, makeup or no makeup. _

_I retied the white apron and walked out of the bathroom. Looking over to the bar, I saw one person sitting on one of the old stools, that nobody used. I couldn't recognize him, and in a small town like this, everybody knew everybody. Gerry wasn't at the bar, probably on break, so I decided to walk over and get a better look; serve this mystery customer. _

_'What can I get for ya?'_

_He looked up from his thoughts, a little surprised I had broken through his subconsciousness. _

_'Oh, uh...'_

_'I don't think we serve that here.' I smirked. This guy seemed uptight, like he needed a strong shot, no chaser. _

_He smiled revealing a set of gorgeous white teeth. His face was clean and shaven, and looked soft to the touch. His eyes shined even brighter than mine had, in a shade of blue so light, it made the sky look dark on a clear day. He wore a black t-shirt which hung relaxed on his frame. It wasn't too tight or loose, but I could see that he was muscular; lean, just by the way it clung to his muscles on his upper arm. He was handsome, even in his apparent troubled state. _

_He lightly laughed. 'I don't usually...'_

_'Come to bars like this?'_

_'Go to bars period.'_

_I laughed. 'So you're one of **those**, huh, blue eyes?'_

_I laid on my flirt, and I know I didn't necessarily have to. I could see he was interested, and I'm sure he saw it was likewise. I saw the way his eyes had wandered; hadn't steered away when I had caught him looking. To say I wasn't flattered would be a lie, but I knew he was southern; a gentleman, as it rang in his polite mannerisms. I didn't think the flirting and glances would go anywhere. _

_After two shots of straight Jack Daniels were downed by the mystery customer, Trent was calling me up for one last song. People had started to clear out already, and Trent and the band were doing their last number. I couldn't understand why everyone was clearing out so early, there was still an hour until last call. _

_I undid my apron and placed it under the counter of the bar. If Mr Mystery was looking before with my loose apron on, he was staring now. _

_'You're Jolene?'_

_'Yep. That's me.'_

_'You're a singer?'_

_'A little.'_

_He motioned for me to get to the stage, and I could see he was curious. _

_Trent had wanted to play guitar for me, while I sang. We agreed on a Carrie Underwood number, airy and fun, 'Cupid's Got a Shotgun'._

_'Yeah Cupid's got a shotgun aiming at my heart,_

_I've been dodging bullets, _

_I've been hiding in the dark,_

_Sawed-off double barrel, _

_Trigger happy as could be  
_

_Cupid's got a shotgun and he's pointing it at me, yeah...'_

_I danced around the stage, making the song my own. When it was over, what was last of the bar cheered, including Mr Mystery who I saw clapping and laughing. _

_'Have a g'night, ya'll!' Trent called, and he and his crew started packing up. _

_I jumped down and walked over the counter, grabbing my apron and tying it around my waist once more. _

_I looked at Mr Mystery and he appeared to be speechless._

_'What?' I giggled. _

_'You have a really pretty voice. And a big one. I was surprised something so big came out of something so small.'_

_'Thank you, always appreciate the compliments on my singing.'_

_'Jo.. Jolene? That was your name?'_

_I nodded. _

_'Like the Dolly Parton...?' He trailed off, and I laughed. _

_'Yep, just like the song. My mama's favorite.'_

_He smirked to himself._

_'Another drink?'_

_'I should head home..' He looked toward the door, and I thought I felt my heart sink a little. He seemed nice, and I had supposed I wanted to get to know him. 'Hell, why not?'_

_I smiled and poured him another shot of whiskey, except this one was poured into a glass with some coke. He seemed to enjoy that more. _

_'It's a lot easier to drink this way, you know.' He smirked and I giggled again. What was it about this No-Name that had me feeling so giddy? Sure, he was a looker, and super nice, but he made me feel excited, something that didn't happen all too often in this small town. _

_'So, you know my name - you gonna tell me yours?'_

_He smiled and nodded. 'It's Rick.' He extended his hand. _

_'Nice to meet you, Rick.' I grabbed it, and took note they were calloused. _

_'I'm terrible at introductions, but likewise to you, Jolene.'_

_'So what brings you out here anyway?'_

_'Home life; it ain't the best.'_

_Home life? Did that mean he wasn't single..? I snuck a peek down to see if he was wearing a ring, but only his right hand was on the table. His left must have been rested on his leg. _

_He saw me look and laughed softly. Lifting his left hand on the table, I saw the gold band that looked like it needed some cleaning. Then again, when I looked at Rick, it looked like he had a heavy heart. He reminded me of his ring - almost neglected, but not completely, because he still wore it. _

_'She's mad at me. All the time.'_

_His wife neglected him, but not entirely. She paid enough attention to him to get mad._

_'Why?'_

_'Who knows. Some days it's because I get home late from work, some days it's because I can't make it for our son's soccer games. Some days it's just because and I know I don't do a damn thing wrong, but I'm always wrong.'_

_I saw how troubled he was, and I was genuinely sympathetic._

_'Well if you aren't in places like this all the time, then what's she got to be angry over?'_

_'That's just it. I don't know. Sometimes, I swear, she wants a divorce. She just doesn't know how to say it yet.'_

_'And you, what do you want?'_

_He bit the inside of his cheek and looked at me. In that moment, barely knowing him; I knew he was just a stranger telling me his problems, and it was none of my business, but I wanted to hold and comfort him more than anything._

_'Sometimes I think it would be easier.. But sometimes, I just, I think of how she used to be. She wasn't always upset all the time. She used to be happy. She used to laugh. She-' He cut himself off. 'I'm sorry. I shouldn't flood you with my problems.'_

_'It's okay. Really. I might only be the waitress, but I can play bartender.' I smiled softly and saw him smile back. _

_'Thank you.'_

* * *

_When I looked up and saw the time, over an hour had past. _

_The bar had long cleared out, and in speaking with him, I hadn't even noticed. It wasn't until Gerry had called out he was leaving that I finally saw what time it was. _

_'I'd better get going.' __He spun around on the stool. He laughed as he started to make his way to the door. _

_'What?'_

_'This time, she might actually have a reason to be mad at me.'_

_I laughed with him._

_He nodded and smiled. 'I'll have to come around again sometime, to hear you sing again.'_

_I smiled. 'Sure thing.'_

_The door shut behind him. And as I walked over to lock it, it flew open again. He stood in front of me, just steps away. _

_'I forgot my coat.'_

_I looked to the coat rack and saw a unrecognizable brown coat hanging there. I grabbed it and handed it to him. Our fingers gently touched and in an instant he had me in his arms, lips up against mine. _

_His lips were soft but moved to quickly for me to even process that what we were doing was wrong. But was it, really? After everything he had told me; if she didn't want to be with him, why couldn't he be happy? Even if only momentarily?_

_He didn't let his hands wander, just held my face in place, and explored my lips. He gently slid his tongue into my mouth and mine found his, matching his apparent hunger._

_He was lonely, and conversation now wasn't the only indication._

_He had let one hand drop from my face, to my waist and pulled me even closer._

_And then, just as suddenly as the hungry kiss began, he pulled back._

_We both had the embarrassed disheveled look about us. _

_'What are we doing?' I asked, more to myself than him._

_'I - I don't know.'_

_'Oh God, you're married. Rick, this -'_

_'It's wrong.'_

_I hesitated. I knew morally it was wrong, but it sure didn't feel wrong. 'Yes.'_

_'I'm - I'm so sorry, Jolene. I never should have dragged you into this.' He stammered and blushed._

_My turn to blush. 'It's okay. I didn't push you away either.'_

_He looked up at me, and I saw he wanted me again, but this time he held himself back._

_'You should go.' As much as I wanted him, I knew I couldn't have him. Better he leave. 'It'll be okay, Rick. Just, you need to leave now. Go home to your wife. Whether you tell her or not is your decision, but it's just best you go right now. I'm sorry.'_

_He nodded and walked out the door. _

_When did I become my namesake? _


	4. Chapter 4

_A month passed what seemed to be slowly; slower than ever. _

_Rick never did come back, and I knew why. I tried not to let my memories of him linger; his kiss, his scent, his taste, his smile, his eyes - all of it. I pushed it all out of my mind. _

_I sat up in bed and rubbed my eyes. The house was quiet, as it always was. Mama would still be asleep, and no one would be downstairs. Not yet. The Ol' Boot didn't open until one in the afternoon, anyway._

_I hopped in the shower and closed my eyes. It was the same thing every time I got a second alone, truly alone, like I was now. Those clear blue eyes would come creeping into my thoughts, along with the haunting kiss of what could never be. _

_It's not that I was in love Rick, or even the idea of him. He had made me feel so, alive. The excitement he brought out in me, wasn't something I was accustomed to feeling. In the town of broken dreams, and the bar of drowned expectations, you don't usually feel so special. Singing gave me almost a buzz, being able to be on stage and pour my heart out. Being with Rick - it was like a high altogether. And for what reason I couldn't fathom. _

_He was married._

_End of discussion, Jolene. _

_I shut the tap off and climbed out of the shower, wrapping a towel around myself. I walked into my room with wet feet and proceeded to get dressed and ready for my day. _

_I threw on a pair of dark blue jeans. They hugged my figure and hung off my hips. I added a white t-shirt to my ensemble with the Corvette logo on the front. I slipped on my boots and a skinny, brown braided belt. I put my hair in a side braid and put on brown eyeshadow and liner. _

_I walked downstairs and out the front door of the bar. It doubled as our front door as well. I waved as Daryl drove by on his bike and reached into the mailbox. _

_Bill. _

_Bill. _

_Scam. _

_Newspaper. _

_When I came to the newspaper, I felt my heart stop beating. At least that was what it felt like. A cop had been shot, and was now in a coma. They didn't know if he would pull out of it. _

_The cop was Rick. _

_Nerves shot and head spinning, the only thing I could do was laugh aloud nervously. 'He's a cop.'_

_All I wanted to do was go visit him, but they didn't have the hospital information disclosed, and what would I say if I saw his wife there,__**'oh hi, I met your husband in my dingy bar. We made out. And well, now I'm hear to wish him well' **__?_

_What a tangled web I weaved. _

_And yet all I had to do was get him out of my head and forget him. This made it worse now. I hoped and prayed he'd be okay. _

_That was all I could do. _

* * *

**Hey guys, FanFic456 hurr. **

**Hope you're liking it so far! Don't worry, there's more to come, that's for sure! **

**I apologize for le short chapter. I figured this was a good place to end it, and I want to get started on the next!**

**Happy reading, Faithfuls! :) **


	5. Chapter 5

_'Mama, you've got to hurry. We're never going to make it early enough.'_

_It was 3am. We were already running behind. The day before on the news all people in surrounding areas were told to get to Atlanta. We were supposed to be gone 2 hours ago. The drive wasn't very long of one, but it was dangerous. Risk of running into someone sick wasn't too high, but it was high enough to be concerned. Those who were sick weren't right in the head. They liked to bite. The disease was transferred in that way. I also didn't want to get stuck into traffic._

_I honked the horn of my faded green Oldsmobile. _

_She forgotten her cigarettes in the house, and I let her run in to get them. She had been sober, but for all I knew now she could be drinking away what little head start we'd had of avoiding traffic. _

_I stuck my head out the window once more, 'Mama!'_

_Still nothing. _

_'Shit.' I shut the engine off and grabbed the keys on my way into the bar's entrance. 'Mama?'_

_I stood still and listened. I wasn't much of a hunter, but when my dad would come around, he'd take me. Maybe that was why I could hear what sounded like someone breathing raggedly._

_I watched enough horror movies to know that this was not the time to call for the person I was looking for. _

_I carried my small pocket knife in my jeans. I pulled it out and got it ready. Breathing quickly. but quietly as possible. Blood rushing and heart pumping. I knew I was scared, but I needed to know if she was okay. I couldn't wait anymore for her._

_I approached the counter, and heard the pace of breath change. I knew behind it was what I was hearing. I looked over and would have puked had I not been so terrified. _

_My mother laid in a pool of blood; her own, and her face was twisted in agony. She couldn't scream, or cry for my help. She wasn't dead, she had looked up at me and inhaled when she saw I was standing there. _

_On top of her, gnawing at her, was one of those sick freaks. _

_Her left arm was gone, along with a piece of her shoulder and neck. _

_Instinct took over, and before even considering the risk of that thing eating me, or before it even had a chance to get up, I drove my pocket knife over and over into the top of it's head until it collapsed dead. Only when the corpse fell over, did I see that it was Gerry. He must have come back to check on us. _

_'I'm sorry.' I whispered to him. _

_'Mama.' I rushed to her side, and folded up one of the aprons hidden under the counter under her head. I rested it on my knees and pushed her blonde hair off of her face. 'I'm so sorry. I should have came with you... I should have-'_

_'Shh.' She choked out, just barely. _

_I knew, I could tell, she wouldn't make the drive to the hospital. But I still tried and bargained with her and God. _

_'I'll help you up, and we can drive as fast as my car can go. We'll get you fixed up, we'll-'_

_'Jolene. I won't never make it..'_

_I started to cry. _

_She was an alcoholic. She hated my father, and named me in spite of anything he had done. But it didn't matter. She was my mother, and not only was I all she had, she was all I had. _

_'Please, mama. We have to try.'_

_'Look at 'cha.' She chuckled coughing. 'I remember you said that to me once 'fore. You saw a pony, and fer months, ya wanted 'im. I said we couldn't have 'im, and ya bawled. I said, we couldn't afford 'im. You cried, and cried, an' that was what you said, Jo Jo.'_

_I laughed a little through my tears. _

_'Sing Jo Jo, please.'_

_'Often when death has taken our loved ones,_

_Leaving our home so lone and so drear,_

_Then do we wonder why others prosper,_

_Living so wicked year after year.' _

_I only managed to get out one verse of 'Farther Along' before crying like a baby. She didn't move, and that was when I noticed I didn't feel her breath anymore. _

_Not knowing what to do, I ran from our old home and to my car. Tears made my vision blurry, but I didn't care. _

_I drove to one place where I'm sure someone would understand me. I didn't want to be alone. _

_I didn't even knock at his door. And when he came to answer it, in his vest, shirtless I didn't care about our awkward boundaries. I ran into his arms and held on to him, crying hard. _

_'Jolene?'_

_'She's gone. And Gerry too. He ate her, he just-' I trailed off, traumatized. _

_I felt his body tense up, and he was ready to push me off, probably, but instead he wrapped his arms around me, comforting me. _

_'I'm sorry.' He muttered. _

_'We need to get out of here.'_

_'I know.'_

_'Merle too. And your daddy.'_

_I see his face cloud over, and I know he too has lost his only parent. _

_'Well, whoo-ee what do we got here? Hey pretty lady. Ya come on over fer Ol' Merle, or what?'_

_I ignored him, unable to even speak at his offensive slurs. _

_'Merle! Caroline jus' died. Have some respect! Ya bitch.' Daryl yelled. _

_'I'm sorry li'l darlin'. I didn't know.'_

_'Are we getting out of here, or what?' I asked, no longer crying. _

_They stared at me. _

_'Those things aren't sick people. I saw the look on Gerry's face.. He wasn't just sick. Something takes them over.' _

_The Dixon brothers nodded together, knowing exactly what I meant. _

_'Let's get the hell outta here.' Daryl threw his brother a bag, and grabbed another for himself. _

_'I'm ridin' my bike. Merle, ya hop in with her. Ya gonna be okay to drive?' He looks at me. _

_I just stared at him. _

_He grabbed my keys from my hand and tossed 'em in Merle's direction. _

_'You drive her car. Jolene'll drive with me.'_

_Merle nods and we all leave the house. _

_Normally I'd be pretty fussy on who would drive my car, but right now, I could care less if someone took a baseball bat to it. _

_I wrap my arms around Daryl's muscular figure and we all ride off together. _

_Time for a road trip with the Dixon boys. _


	6. Chapter 6

_'God I miss showering.'_

_'There's a lake out there.'_

_'It's not the same, you know that.'_

_'Works just as well.'_

_I rolled my eyes. Typical Merle. Almost a month had passed since everything went to shit and people started eating each other. Only they weren't people, 'walkers' was what we referred to the monsters as. _

_I stuck with the Dixon boys, they were the only people I could really feel safe around and trust. We were camped out in the woods, sleeping in one tiny tent under the stars. Mind you, it was usually me in the tent, Daryl or Merle outside on the ground, and whoever wasn't sleeping kept watch. Even on the nights it was my turn to keep watch, They both chose to sleep on the ground - I guess they didn't want to evade my privacy. Funny because I remembered Merle being the one adamant on getting into my panties before he died. Even though that day could come sooner for us than any one of think, he still wasn't going to even come close. I guess he finally got the picture and gave up on it. The occasional comment was all he sent my way now, and it was better that way. _

_I sat cross-legged by Merle around where we held our fires. It was mid-day. and we hadn't needed one. I pushed the ash left over from last night around with a stick. I sighed. _

_'Guess I'll go 'shower'.' I exaggerated the quotations around the word 'shower'._

_Merle scoffed. 'Take yer knife. And a gun. Don't use the gun-'_

_'If I don't have to.' I finished for him, imitating his tone. I quickly giggled. 'I know Merle, I got the hang of this now.'_

_I stood up, brushing my palms and bottom off. I walked over to the tent, reached in after unzipping it, and grabbed my backpack. Spare clothes, a tooth brush, shampoo, razors, and a towel; I was set. _

_'See ya later.'_

_'If ya have any trouble, holler. An' if ya see Darylina - an' I'm sure ya will - tell him to get his ass back to camp with that so called 'firewood' he's gone for three times. Boy's only brought back an armful of sticks in the past three days..'_

_'Sure thing, man. But I won't!' I called behind me. _

_Merle had it in his head something was going on with Daryl and I, just because every time I went to bathe, Daryl went missing. Didn't mean we were meeting up._

_I reached the lake, and made sure no walkers were around. I rested my pack on the ground and begun to get undressed, hanging my clothes on the tree. _

_The water was chilly, but once I had washed and shaved, I had gotten used to it. I wanted to relax, but knew there was no such thing as relaxing anymore. I emerged from the water, and dried off. I put on a fresh bra and pair of panties. I pulled on a cleaner pair of jeans, low rise and light blue and strapped my knee to my leg. I holstered my gun and pulled on my white muscle shirt. I frowned at my impracticality. Go figure I wouldn't think and only pack a black bra or a red bra. Right now my black bra showed through the thin white fabric. I rolled my eyes and started off into the forest toward the direction I knew Daryl would be in. _

_I saw him, cutting down some smaller trees with just a hatchet. _

_I took a look around, there were no walkers anywhere, and with his ears, none would be able to sneak up on him. _

_I started slowly creeping, trying with all my might to be quiet as he had showed me. My feet planted softly on the ground after each step, he didn't appear to hear anything. I knew what I was doing could be dangerous; he could swing and turn that hatchet on me at any second and I would be dead. _

_But I doubted that would happen, and what was the harm in some fun? _

_He was in my arm's reach, and I jumped at him then, wrapping my arms around his waist and tackling him to the ground. _

_His body tensed until he heard my laugh, then he relaxed. _

_'What the fuck you doin' girl? I coulda put that hatchet through yer head!'_

_'Just showing off what you taught me.' I smiled. _

_'Use that on yer prey, not on me.' He lightly chuckled._

_'Awe, what's the matter, Daryl? Did I scare you?' I teased. _

_He scoffed and smirked. 'Ya wish.'_

_'Ol' Merle thinks we're sneaking around again.' I giggled. _

_'That Merle.'_

_'The nerve of him.'_

_He pulled me into his arms and I kissed his lips lightly. _

_Merle thought we were fooling around. Didn't mean we were, but in this case, yes, we were. Merle was right. _

_'Should we tell 'im?' Daryl asked breaking the kiss. _

_'Nah. Sneaking around is half the fun, don't you think?' I winked. _

_Daryl kissed me, and still after so long I would find myself comparing his kiss to that of the last man's - Rick. Rick was gentle, and hungry. Daryl's was hungry and rough. The only thing that was the same was that they had both gone wild when our lips touched. _

_I didn't love Daryl. _

_He didn't love me. _

_But there's something about the world's apparent end that makes you think twice. Maybe, like before our tortured souls made all the difference, and now more so that we had endured even more suffering._

_To deny that Daryl wasn't attractive would almost be a sin. But he was attractive in a different way. Hard good looks and tough attitude to go with it. He tried the whole, 'I don't want you' game with me the first night I had kissed him. It was him who had caved and slipped into the tent beside me after. _

_I broke off from Daryl's heated kiss. 'Maybe we should tell your brother.'_

_'Why?'_

_'I don't know .. He is your brother, after all.'_

_Daryl laughed and gently tugged on my bottom lip with his teeth. _

_'Seriously?' _

_'Seriously, Daryl.'_

_He rolled his eyes. 'Okay, okay. I'll tell him.'_

_'Why don't you want him to know?'_

_'You were the one who said ya liked sneakin' 'round..'_

_'We could still sneak, just now, you get to sleep in the tent with me, every night.'_

_He laughed. 'Added bonus, I guess. Grab some wood.' _

_I looked at him and started laughing. _

_'Ya know, that ain't what I meant. Goddamn dirty mind.'_

_I started picking up the small logs he had cut. 'I'm grabbing, I'm grabbing.'_

_We returned to Merle with our arms full of wood. _

_''Bout damn time!' _

* * *

_We sat around our small fire, Daryl beside me, and Merle on the other end. We kept it low, along with our voices. _

_'Darylina here ever tell you about how he got his nickname?'_

_'Merle-' Daryl began._

_'No, no' I started. 'I want to hear.' I shot Daryl a coy sideways glance. _

_'When he was 'bout - how old was ya Darylina? Ten? - anyway, however ol' he was, Darylina here would always wanna go huntin'. 'Take me huntin' Merle; take me huntin', daddy' - it was always the same. Anyway, one day we 'cide to take 'im with us, and he comes boltin' outta the house in our ma's heels!' Merle wheezed and laughed from deep inside, the same way he always did. I giggled and shot a look at Daryl. He wasn't very impressed with Merle talking. Merle continued. 'Oh Darylina, don't be sore now. Anyway, we laugh an' tell 'im to take these damn shoes off, and he goes, 'Naw, they's gon' help me catch some deer. They's my quiet shoes!' Quiet shoes? I said, 'Boy, you gon' sink you take one step on the grass' and sure 'nough, he jumps off the deck, and them damn shoes sink. Kid twisted his ankle. Graceful as a damn deer, I tell ya. Ain't that right Darylina?' Merle howled. _

_'I still say you was on the deck, and pushed me.'_

_'Okay you two!' I laughed. The boys were a riot._

_'You gonna tell 'im?' Daryl stared at me._

_'What? I thought you said you would!'_

_'Nah. Let's see how funny this little story is.' He teased. _

_I rolled my eyes. 'Big baby.'_

_'Tell me what?' Merle asked, eyeing Daryl suspiciously. 'I swear if ya'll touched my stash, there's gon' be trouble.'_

_'Ain't nobody touched your damn booze, Merle. Listen to the girl.'_

_'What exactly do I say is going on?' I looked at Daryl. We knew we weren't dating. It was more of a 'hook up before your dead; what have we got to lose' situation. _

_Daryl shrugged, then spoke up. 'Merle, you was right.'_

_'Heh? Right 'bout what?'_

_We sat in silence for a few minutes, until Merle put two and two together._

_'HOOO. YOU'RE JUMPING BABY BROTHER'S BONE?' He laughed and wheezed. _

_'Told ya it'd get worse.' Daryl mumbled. _

_'Well honey, if ya wanted a real man, all ya had to do was ask.' _

_'Watch it, Merle.' I said, only half joking. _

_'He best, or I'm gon' shove my boot up his arse.' Daryl said staring at Merle._

_'Oh c'mon ya'll. It's funny. God damn kill-joys.'_

_We sat in silence for a little while; Daryl's arm around my shoulders, Merle carving a stick. _

_'Hey. Jolene.'_

_It wasn't often Merle would call me by my name. It was always 'Sweet Lips' or 'Honey' or 'Girl'. 'Candy Ass' was starting up slowly as well. _

_'Yeah?'_

_'Darylina there good in the sack?' He started chucking. _

_I rolled my eyes and took my head off of Daryl's shoulder. 'Sick him.'_

_Daryl got up. 'Let's see how far I can shove my foot up that ass o' yers, and how far down I shove my fist into yer mouth before the two o' 'em touch.'_

_'Fuck off, man!'_


	7. Chapter 7

_I rolled over and looked at the time on my watch, 2:48 AM. _

_It was the same dream. _

_I saw Daryl. He laid in a hospital bed. And he wouldn't wake up, no matter what I did. _

_The room he was in was white. No doors, no windows. _

_Until the room turns black, and a door appears. _

_I start running, and I don't know why, so I stop. _

_The door disappears. _

_And I hear Daryl stir in the bed. Only it isn't Daryl. I walk over to the bed and find Rick. _

_He's about to kiss me, then his skin decays. _

_His hair falls out. _

_And he grabs my arm, holding tight. _

_He becomes a walker._

_I always wake up at that part. _

_I'm not even sure what my dream could mean. Obviously, I still thought of Rick; everyday. But why the dream went from Daryl to Rick, I couldn't understand. And it drove me crazy, night after night. _

_I looked beside me, to my snoring protector. _

_Did I really have any feelings for him? Or he for me? I cared about him, I did. And he must have cared for me, since he kept me around. But if this wasn't the end of the world, would we even be here? _

_I closed me eyes, and imagined what it would have been like. Me in a dress; flowing and bright yellow. Daryl; not wearing that vest and clean jeans. Dinner. Dancing. A kiss goodnight that turned into a kiss good morning... I shook my head. Like Daryl would even put on a clean pair of jeans._

_I try to imagine again. Me in jeans and cute top. Daryl in a black t-shirt and dark jeans. Daryl comes to see me. Forgets his brown jacket. Comes back and kisses me. Leaves my head spinning, and my heart pounding. _

_I rubbed my eyes. I knew damn well it wasn't Daryl I was thinking of. _

_I examined Daryl's features in the dark. He was really quite handsome and he looked so peaceful sleeping._

_I heard Merle spit outside, then clear his throat. _

_I turned away from Daryl, and again imagined what life would have been like. Me; in that same high waist-ed skirt and red t-shirt I had worn before. He; in a blue t-shirt and jeans. Yes. The shirt had to be blue because it would make his eyes absolutely shine. Scratch that. I wanted to wear a blue t-shirt. It would compliment him all the more. Sitting on the hood of my car, sun setting. He would kiss me, and my heart would pound. We wouldn't be able to hold ourselves back. He'd lean me up against the windshield, kissing my lips, moving down the my neck, lingering at my shirt. He'd pull it off, and lay gentle kisses up and down my chest and stomach..._

_I turned back toward Daryl, nudging him awake. _

_'Hey. Hey?'_

_'Hmm? What'sa matter?'_

_I crashed my lips to his, and all at once he understood the urgency of my kiss._

_He slipped his hand under my over-sized t-shirt, feeling my bare breasts. I felt him grow harder with each caress, but I held him back; even if only for a little longer. He slipped off my panties, and then pulled my shirt over my head. He kissed up and down my body, lighting me on fire. When he finally pushed himself into me, he suppressed a moan deep in his throat. He lasted as long as I had imagined, and collapsed beside me, satisfied. He brushed my hair off of my face, and laid a kiss on my forehead. _

_He rolled over, and soon again, I heard his snore. _

_I rolled over and closed my eyes, unsatisfied._

_The sex had been good; great. _

_But I found myself thinking back to my fantasy. I couldn't remember if it was Daryl or Rick I was seeing. But I knew it wasn't Daryl I had seen making 'love' to me. _


	8. Chapter 8

_I woke up the next morning to a smiling Daryl staring at me. _

_'Mornin'.'_

_I half smiled at him. This was new. Even if it had been the first morning I had woke up with him actually next to me, Daryl didn't smile in the morning. He actually growled more than anything. _

_'What's got you so cheerful this morning?'_

_'Well, for one, waking up to ya-' He paused, looking almost embarrassed by his words. When he began to speak again, he mumbled. 'It's nice. You look real pretty when you sleep.'_

_I was taken aback by his words. Sure, he'd called me 'hot' once before, but 'pretty'? This was new altogether. And, as sweet as it was, it was like a rusty knife turning in my stomach._

_'Uh, thanks, Daryl.' I smiled meekly._

_We laid in silence for a while, then he rolled on his back. I stared at his muscular chest and stomach. Strange how I could touch him, yet I refrained from it. _

_'What was that last night, Jolene?' A light smirk played on his face, and I knew exactly what he was talking about. _

_'What?' I played stupid. I was hoping he would have thought it would have been a dream. Or course, nothing that felt that phenomenal could even remotely be close to a dream. _

_ He gave me a funny look. 'Ya know.'_

_'Oh. Yeah. __**That**__.' I chewed my lip. How do I explain? Do I tell the truth? Or do I lie? What was the truth anyway? I had imagined he was a completely different person. That would be an ego killer. Not to mention, I'd have to explain these weird feelings, and those awkward fantasies. Especially, and more specifically, the one before we'd had our late night session. Explain to Daryl Dixon that I imagined a date with someone else, and I wasn't sure whether or not that someone was him. Major mental face palm. _

_So, instead of telling the truth, I lie. 'I had a bad dream.'_

_'Bad dream makes ya ... do that? Damn girl. Yer all kindsa crazy, or what?'_

_'Uh, guess so.' I sat up quickly and nervously. Suddenly the walls of the tent were closing in. Or was that my guilt?_

_'Hey.' He said softly. The softest tone I had ever heard him speak. He sat up beside me and softly grabbed my hand. Had I not been so surprised at his tenderness, my eyes would have popped out of my head. This was definitely new. He used his other hand to turn my face toward him and lightly hold it there. 'You okay?'_

_I swallowed hard. Truth time. 'Yeah. Uh, yes. Just - you're not usually like this.' Okay, some truth. _

_He shrugged. 'Guess ya got me bein' all kindsa crazy, too.' That devilish smirk appeared again. _

_He leaned over and kissed me. Despite his more gentle caresses, his kiss remained rough, though I could tell he was trying to control it. His pace was slower than usual. Surprised didn't even describe my state at that moment in time. Especially after his tongue brushed against my bottom lip. Especially after he slowly laid me back down and continued to kiss me the same way. After a few minutes he pulled away leaving me dumbfounded. _

_He kissed my forehead and then my eyelids. He laughed at what I supposed was the look on my face. He pulled on what used to be a grey t-shirt (with the sleeves now cut-off), and left me in the tent. _

_I ran my fingers through my hair. _

_What the hell was even going on anymore? _

_I put a pillow over my face. I hated myself. Was I playing Daryl? Had I played Rick too?_

_Rick._

_Why were my thoughts still running and racing after someone I had only spent a few hours with? Why couldn't I forget him? I thought about his picture in the paper, and wondered if he ever woke up. If he hadn't maybe it was for the better. No, I didn't genuinely believe that. _

_I thought about walkers getting into his room, creeping up to him laying helpless in that bed.._

_I shuddered. _

_Before anything had happened to him, did he ever think about me? Did he ever wonder if he was on my mind too? _

_I pulled at my hair and resisted the urge to scream. _

_Rick. Daryl. _

_Daryl. Rick._

_What was I going to do...?_

_I knew I had to tell Daryl. I also knew, I'd probably never see Rick again. I shuddered again at my earlier thought of those things creeping up to. _

_There was something else complicating to add to the mix. _

_Was Daryl actually falling for me?  
_

_Daryl Dixon? __Falling in love with me?_

* * *

**And Faithfuls, this is where I leave it.  
**

**Ponder that, ya'll. **

**;)**

**Have a great weekend. (I on the one hand have all kinds of crap to figure out, but yes - have a wonderful weekend!)**

**FanFic456 loves heading your way! 3 **


	9. AUTHOR'S NOTE, PLEASE READ

**Hi gaiz and galz :) . **

**GOD it has been too long I've been away - too long!  
And after reading the final chapter I posted, I left ya'll in suspense :o . WHAT KIND OF  
AUTHOR AM I?!**

**Tehe.**

**Anyway, I'm so sorry I haven't had a chance to write in so long. Believe me, it is ALWAYS on my mind, and I feel horrible that I haven't updated. So, here it is - in writing - a promise. I'll update as soon as I get the chance. Since I only have my cell at home (and I haven't even attempted to write on there), I usually just use the computer at work, whether I stay late and use it, or whether I have nothing else to do and use it - I USE IT. LOL**

**I'll find the time; make the time to bring you this suspenseful tale of love, zombies, sweaty, hot men, and bom-chika-wow-ow.**

**Hope everyone is in good health and in good spirits to find this e-letter (don't know if this is a term, just gonna leave it there).**

**Much loves, and I hope you're still Faithfuls.**

**FanFic456**


	10. Chapter 9

_After a few deep breaths, I unzipped my pack and started getting dressed. I slipped on a black tank top and a pair of knee length shorts. Add my cowboy boots, and hair up in messy bum - I was set. I put on my sunglasses, strapped my knife to my leg, and slipped my gun in the back of my jeans. _

_'I need to find a holster..' I muttered aloud mostly just to get my mind off of everything._

I emerged from the tent and what I saw made my heart sink and pound all at the same time. At the sounds of the zipper, Daryl turned around and shot me a smirk. His eyes shone, and he looked happy. It cut like a knife and made me want to push it deeper all at the same time.

'So boys, what's our plan today?' I smiled.

_'Merle and I know of a Walmart up ahead, thinkin' we could try 'er out. See what's left.'_

_'Might be a lot. Never know. I'm game ya'll.'_

_'Now I'm tellin' ya - it's a small area surrounding it - but it's close to a city. Could be crawlin' with them ugly bastards.' Merle spoke up._

_'Now, now, Merle' I began. 'Give me some credit. I'm a better shot than you let on.'_

_'Good aim ain't got nothin' to do with it, Candy Ass.'_

_Daryl looked up. 'Goddamn pervert.'_

_'Ease up boy, I ain't gon' steal your girl - that is unless she wants it.' He winked at me and as much as I had grown to like Merle, it still made me gag._

_'No thanks. I think I just threw up in my mouth a little.' I teased. _

_'Im'a go get my breakfast swig in. Ya'll 'suit up'.' He smiled wide and walked off toward my car._

Daryl's arms were around me in a flash, pinning me up against a tree, lips beneath my ear. 'Think we got a few minutes?' My heart beat fast; he had scared me, and excited me all in one swift motion. 

_'I think it only takes you a few seconds.' I joked. _

_His response was lifting me off the ground and wrapping my legs around his waist. He stared deep into my eyes and I felt his heart beat against my chest. Why was he doing this? It was all my fault. I started it. _

_Daryl ran his hands against my back side, and up my back. It did feel good to have him touch me. He kissed me softly and much slower than he ever had. _

_The voice in my head continued to speak._

_What the hell are you doing? _

_He's falling for you.._

_Take you hands off of him._

_Tell him the truth, Jolene!_

_What about Rick?_

_You're thinking of him right now aren't you? _

_You're thinking of that night in the bar and what would have happened if he didn't pull back... _

_I kissed Daryl harder; faster. The voice shut up. He pulled back. _

_'Jolene..' He muttered so low I could hardly hear. Before the voice could start talking again, I pushed my lips against his and slid my tongue inside his mouth. He moaned, again barely audible. Voice quiet, Daryl was all I wanted. I knew, however, if I stopped - when I stopped - it would start talking again. But for right now, I couldn't handle it._

He slid his hands up and down my body, and into my shirt. His hands lingered at my hips and the kiss intensified. 

_'AHEM. Ya'll needa go back to bed, or what?' _

_Merle.  
_


	11. Chapter 10

_We decided to all take one car. It was safer than splitting up. Merle sat in the back seat, and Daryl and I in the front. He drove and I leaned my head against the window. It was open just a crack, and the breeze was cool despite the hot weather. _

_I closed my eyes. I knew I had to tell him. I just didn't know when - or how to even start. I hated myself, but I knew I wouldn't be able to forgive myself if he did fall in love with me, and I didn't return the feeling._

I yawned. Vivid dreams and fantasies were keeping me up at night. 

_'Yenno, I was just about to say yer lookin' damn tired, girl.' Daryl turned his head sideways and looked at me. _

_'Can't sleep none too well lately.'_

_'Didn't sound like ya'll was doin' too much sleepin'!' Merle mused from the back. Daryl shot him a look in the rear view and Merle chuckled._

I rolled up eyes. The gentle bump of the car on the gravel road was relaxing. Slowly I felt myself drift off to sleep.

* * *

_'Hey? Jolene? We're here.'_

_Daryl shook me awake. I rubbed my eyes under my glasses and undid my seat-belt I stepped out of the car, took a quick glance at the empty parking lot, and proceeded to stretch away my grogginess. _

_'Thought ya said it'd be packed, Merle.' Daryl spoke and his voice remained low. He didn't want to attract any unwanted attention, I'd assumed._

'I didn't say nothin' but a 'maybe'.'

_'Man, whatever. So far, yer wrong.'_

_'Oh shut the hell up.'_

_'Look ya'll, we gonna do this, or what?' I put my hands on my hips._

_'I'll lead.' Merle looked at us and Daryl nodded. _

_Weapons pointed and loaded, safety off we strolled into Walmart as if we were going grocery shopping and our lives depended on it - because it did. _

_Daryl shot me a glance as we walked into the dimly lit building. Bodies of the dead lay across the floor, and down almost every aisle. Blood stained the white tiles and splattered along the checkouts and most shelves as far as I could see. It was quiet, all for the hum of the florescent lights that lingered due to what I assumed was emergency power. _

_I nudged a body with the toe of my boot. 'Should we check the bodies?' I hadn't really wanted to, but if we needed it, I would. _

_'Should just focus on the aisles.' Merle called back to me, and I realized I had fallen behind. Daryl wasn't too far up ahead, but I saw noticed his slow pace, and the glances back in my direction. I smiled at him to put him at ease, but he didn't smile or smirk back. Of course, I could take care of myself; he'd taught me a few things, needless to say, but I started off a decent shot and worked my way into being able to hit a bird in between the eyes from a mile away with both his and Merle's help._

Daryl turned down an aisle, and I decided to follow him. There was more left than we could have hoped for. I slipped off my pack and began piling in the items that lined the shelf - 2 boxes of granola bars, 4 cans of tuna, 8 packages of 'Sidekicks' alfredo noodles, a bag of vegetable crisps - the items grew more abundant as I thumbed my way through the aisle. 

_'Do you see all of this stuff?' I asked excitedly. 'There's enough to keep us fed for quite some time!'_

_He smiled lightly and I knew he was worried about something. _

_'Daryl? What's wrong? You should be happier. There's nothing around here. This place is dead quiet. And even if there was, we'd be able to make it out in time. Don't worry.'_

_'Ya talk in yer sleep.' He muttered._

_It felt like I had been punched in the stomach, or hit in the face. What could I have said? I knew it was something bad, but what?_

_I played stupid. 'What do you mean?'_

His back was turned one second, the next he spun to face me. 'Ya kept sayin' something about 'Not him, please. Keep him safe, please.' and I thought it was me you were dreamin' about.'

_Again, like an idiot - I played completely clueless. 'Who said it wasn't?'_

_'You did.' _

_We stared at each other in silence, and I had wondered what I said. Before I could ask he spoke, 'You just kept on saying, 'Don't love him. No. Daryl, no.' Wonder what that means?'_

_I reached out to touch him, and he pulled back as if I would burn him. Who was I kidding - I'd already had. _

_'Daryl - if you'd just let me explain.'_

_'I think I heard enough.' He turned away, clearly hurt and angry. _

_I let out a deep breath. Why couldn't I had just told him? Things would have been so much simpler. I trudged forward and focused on the task at hand. I loaded up a few bottles of 'Smart Water', and made my way towards the clothes. There wasn't much left, but I had found a few things - a pair of black jeans with rips in the knee, a pair of denim shorts, a few pairs of panties and a bra, a pack of socks, a yellow t-shirt with the back made of lace (it wasn't very practical, but it would suffice), and a pink tank-top. I stuffed the items into my bag and then looked around. The boys were no where in site._

Fumbling with my gun, and my bag, I decided to go look for a holster. I walked past the pharmacy on my way there and loaded up on whatever I could find. A bottle of 'Advil', a box of allergy medication, a container of 'gummy' vitamins, and a box of 'Barbie' band-aids.

_I continued my trek over to the outdoors section. _

_CRACK._

I stopped dead in my tracks and spun around. 'What the hell was that?' I whispered. When I didn't hear it again, I continued walking slowly, listening and looking down every aisle. When I got to the cabinet, I found it unlocked - actually, it had been busted open. Glass crunched over my boots as I stepped closer and saw a holster that God must have left here for me - light pink camo print etched arcoss it. I was in love. 

_In the moment of pure bliss, I didn't hear the second 'CRACK.' I didn't pay close enough attention, and I should have. Because what was about to happen, was about to leave me alone. _


	12. Chapter 11

_Did I even once think that I was right beside the garden centre? Or that it was in the back of the building? Where we clearly hadn't seen anything because we only saw the front of the building?_

_No._

_And now I just kept running, screaming for Daryl; screaming for Merle. _

_There had to have been close to one-hundred dead people chasing me, moaning and growling; hungry. I turned and took down five, pegging each one of them in the head. Turned again - number 6 dropped, but the herd kept on coming. _

_'Shit!' I slammed my next clip in my gun and kept running. _

_'Daryl! Merle!' _

_'Jolene?!' Daryl's voice. _

_'Daryl! Please!'_

_I screamed as a walker rushed out in front of me and inched closer to biting my neck. I didn't have much time, either he'd eat me - or the herd would catch up. I had maybe thirty seconds. with my free hand I reached for my knife and plowed it right into his eye socket. I threw it down, but unfortunately my knife went with it. _

_'Fuck!' I screamed again. I didn't have enough bullets to take them all down - none of us did. We just needed to get out of this fucking place. _

_'Jolene!' I looked back and saw Daryl and Merle, behind the herd, up against a wall. Merle using his gun; Daryl his crossbow. They were trapped. _

_'NO!' _

_They would die because of me. I had to think fast, either them of me. And how would I get the whole herd's attention anyway?_

_'They had climbed up on a shelf. 'GO!' Daryl screamed at me. _

_I continued running, and looking back at them. There had to be a way, there had to be. I tripped and fell back into a pile of glass. I cried out in pain as a shard went deep into my hand and blood spurt everywhere. _

_As if clockwork, almost every walker turned and faced me. Hand dripping blood they were all in a trance. This was how I would save Daryl and Merle. I pulled the large shard out of my hand and let out a scream of pain._

_'JOLENE! NO!' _

_I cut my leg and let the blood drain out. I had to move fast if I was going to be able to give them enough time to get out before I lost too much blood. _

_Daryl jumped off the shelf and started screaming my name. Merle jumped down and started shooting. _

_'RUN!' I called to them, but they ignored my plea. 'GODDAMMIT! I WON'T DIE FOR NOTHING!'_

_The room spun, and I knew I didn't have much time. I was just about to make it for the front door when everything turned black. _


	13. Chapter 12

_The lights shut off leaving the four of us in the dark. I let out a cry as a hand grabbed my arm and held it tight. This was how it would end, I wouldn't give them the satisfaction of letting me become one of them - no. I was going to put myself out of my misery.. _

_'It's me.' He whispered._

_'Daryl?' _

_The lights flickered back on and I'd realized I'd put a few aisles difference between us and the walkers. _

_'You and Merle go! You can't take me with you, I'll just be putting you in danger!' _

_He ignored me. And pulled me along silently, trying to stay out of site. _

_'They smell the blood!' I whispered stubbornly. _

_'I'm not leavin' you.'_

_'Yes, you are, Daryl Dixon!'_

_He turned and pushed his mouth down on mine hard and fast. 'Yer gettin' out alive.'_

_I wasn't sure if it was loss of blood or the surprise kiss but I was dizzy and could feel myself getting weaker. _

_We slipped into a stock room and his behind a few large crates. He looked at my wounds quickly. _

_'Shit.' He literally ripped my tank top off of my body, leaving me exposed and in nothing but my bra and dirty jeans. Before I could object he fasted on piece of it over my hand, and the other around my leg. _

_'Where's Merle?'_

_No answer._

_'He's in the car?'_

_'He'll meet us there eventually.'_

_The sound of bodies moaning and scratching a door is an awful sound. What's worse is when you're on the other side of it, and you don't know what to do. There had to be a way out. The door for loading was closed and locked with a key. No keys were found anywhere. The was a window, but it was narrow and incredibly high up._

_'Fuck.' Daryl said under his breath._

_I looked around. There had to be something we were missing. As if on cue, I spotted a door. It was high up, and off to the corner. It must have led to the roof, the ladder was there, if we could at least get out of here, we might be able to live on the roof until the walker attack died down. _

_'Daryl - look!' I pointed and started to urge me toward the ladder. _

_'Can you climb up?'_

_'I think so.' I tried and found that the pain wasn't too strong. _

_He glanced back at the door, and then at me. 'Jolene.' I turned to face him before climbing up and he kissed me again. Fast and sweet, hard and longing. 'I'll be right behind you.' I nodded and climbed up._

_I looked down at me once I'd climbed on the small platform. He was still on the ground. I shot him a confused look._

_'Try the door. She if it's locked.'_

_I turned the handle and it flew open. 'It's open!' I looked inside. 'But there's only one handle... What if we need to get out?'_

_Daryl climbed up, shone his flashlight inside and found it to be vacant. 'See that door up ahead?'_

_I nodded._

_'That'll lead to the roof.'_

_'Okay.' Why was he saying this instead of just showing me? 'So we'll make it out someway, right?'_

_He chewed his lip and looked down. The door was whining in protest. Probably too much weight._

_'We should go. Sounds like it's gonna cave any second. We can figure it out later.'_

_'Yeah.' He wrapped his arms around me and pushed me up against the wall. He kissed me for what seemed like hours, when it was only seconds. His lips parted, and his tongue found mine. And as soon as it started, it was over. _

_'Take care o' yerself.'_

_'What?' I asked confused. _

_Daryl threw his flashlight, and his pack into the room, and pushed me in after._

_'WHAT?! DARYL, NO!'_

_The last burst of light disappeared, along with Daryl. _

_Seconds later, I heard the sound of the dead fill the room. _


	14. Chapter 13

_My head was pounding, like my heart was when those things chased me._

_Chasing me? _

_Oh no!_

_'Daryl?!' I sat up screaming. _

_I felt a pair of arms around me in a flash, lips beneath my ear, comforting murmurs escaping them._

_'S'okay. Don't worry. I'm here, girl.'_

_Everything made sense again, now that I was wide awake. _

_'I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-'_

_Daryl's lips gently brushed against my cheek. 'Who else is gon' wake up with ya? Merle?'_

_I scoffed and laughed. I closed my eyes and tried to get rid of the recurring 'video' on play back in my brain - the slamming door, the sound of gunfire and tires screeching, then silence. It had been Merle to the rescue. Ol' Merle who had bust in as little as 4 days ago and saved our asses - saved Daryl's ass. After he had shut the door, he had planned to hold them off as long as he could; had expected Merle to come looking for him, and eventually find me - or actually hear me, screaming my head off. He hadn't counted on me passing out due to blood loss. _

_My wounds were bad. I was pale and weak most of the time. Daryl had wanted to stitch me up, but we never found any supplies. I wouldn't bleed all the time. But when I did, it was bad. And the odor must have been strong considering we had to change camp twice in 4 days. I was attracting walkers, and putting them in danger. And yet they had saved my life._

I couldn't do that to them .. I couldn't. 

_I knew what I had to do. _

_It was just a matter of finding a night when I felt good enough to do it. When nobody would notice me sneaking away. I had to leave. If one of them got hurt - or worse - because of me, I could never live with myself._

I laid back down and Daryl wrapped his arms around me. 'You don't hafta be scared, baby. I'm here.'

_We laid in silence until I felt his chest moving up and down slower. He had fallen asleep. I gently pulled away and done what I had done every other night since the 'incident'. I thought about my leaving, and how much better they'd be without me. _


End file.
